WOO HOO!!!!!

I'm super excited right now. Actually, I've been pretty pumped since yesterday at noon. Why? Well...I'll be MORE than happy to tell you!!!!!

In October of 2007, I (at the encouragement of my peeps at Haymon Homes) joined Weight Watchers. Initially, I joined just to get some people off my back. ;-) I NEVER intended to stick to it. I had never tried a diet before and really didn't think I'd have that much will power. To my surprise, I lost 6.8 pounds my first week!!!!! I remember thinkin', "Okay...there must be something to all this!!!!!" Needless to say, I decided to commit to it.

Here I am now...42.8 pounds lighter. I know. I know. Some reading this probably think I should've lost more in a year. To be honest...I do, too. HOWEVER...I've done it slow and steady. I honestly don't believe I'll ever gain it back. Well...maybe during pregnancy or something! ;-) If that's the case, I more than welcome the weight. ;-)

When I started out, I weighed over 240 pounds. (yeah...I'm gettin' pretty vulnerable right now and just throwing my numbers out there!) Yesterday, I stepped on the scale and saw a 1 at the beginning of my weight. I haven't seen that number in YEARS!!!!! I really don't even remember the last time I saw it.

The first of this year, I went out with this guy named Paul. At that time, I had lost a little less than twenty pounds and needed a few new clothes. Of course, a shopping trip was needed. So, Casi and I loaded up and ventured out to Huntsville for a day of fun and shopping. Being the wonderful and cool person she is, she introduced me to Kohl's (awesome place!...thank you, Casi!!!!!).

If you've ever gone shopping with me, you'll know I'm the WORST person in the world to shop with. First of all, I HATE it. Secondly, I'm extremely picky...but not a good picky. Being heavy all my life and having a horrible self-esteem, I always had the impression of big clothes being better for me because it would hide the weight. In a nutshell...I just wanted to look okay, but never thought I could be beautiful. Therefore, I pretty much focused on covering up and hiding the weight. My goodness...I look back on pictures from Lee and realize more and more why I'm not married! Good grief...awful outfits, bad hair, and a horrible attitude. Overall...I just wasn't happy with myself at all.

So, yeah...Casi's a trooper. Not only did she introduce me to Kohl's, she introduced me to a new way of dressing. ;-) No more pull overs and big sweatshirts!!!!! She was throwing me clothes I'd normally never give a second thought. That day changed my whole way of thinking. It seriously seemed to happen so fast.

So...winter's comin' around again and I needed to break out the cold clothes. I started to put on some of the clothes I got at Kohl's that day with Casi. To my surprise, I couldn't wear them anymore!!!!! I was both happy and sad...happy 'cause I lost more weight and sad 'cause I really did like those clothes!!!!! ;-) No time to be sad, though...we needed to go shopping again!!!!!

This whole experience has really amazed me. I started out in a size 22/24 pants (I can just hear some people gasping!). Now...I'm in a 14/16. I used to wear XXL shirts. I now wear larges. My feet got smaller, too!!!!! REALLY!!!!! People ask how much more I'd like to lose. Honest answer? I really don't know. I'm just taking it day by day. Of course, I want to get smaller. However, I just want to be healthy. Plain and simple.

In high school, I was in good shape simply because of sports. Going into college, I heard the phrase "...puttin' on the freshman fifteen." Well...I went above and beyond and created a new phrase "...puttin on the freshman fifty"! ;-) After losing Melanie, I simply didn't care anymore. I basically wanted to look presentable...that's it. So, my life and weight can be put into three categories...high school, college, and after Melanie. Kind've like the two pictures posted in this blog...the first is in black/white and is pre-Weight Watchers. The seond was in May '08 and in color (lost about ten more since then!). That's exactly what I feel like...my eyes have been opened. By the way...that's my fashion coordinator with me. Thank you, Casi!!!!! ;-)


Last October, I made the choice to walk in Healing, to take my sister with me, and to start living again. Yeah...it still hurts. It hurts horribly bad. It always will. God and time, however, have a wonderful way of Healing. He has given me the strength to accept Life...Spiritually, emotionally, and physically.

I remember me and Pastor Wayne standing outside Freedom House a couple of years ago talking about random stuff. Somehow, we started talking about weight. I told him my weight was on my mind constantly and that I knew I desperately needed to get it under control. He said, "Sherrie, just think...what if your husband is fifty pounds away?" I knew even then those words would always be in my mind. I knew it wasn't Pastor Wayne saying it. It was a "moment" for me...one of those life changing
phrases.

Okay, wait...don't mistake what I mean here. I'm not saying my husband will come bee bopping through the doors the very minute I lose exactly fifty pounds (not saying it couldn't happen, either!). I'm simply saying those words sparked something in my Spirit that I couldn't shake. The closer I get to fifty pounds, the more excited I get.

It's a cool place to be, though...whether he comes or not, I'm happy. I'm happy being healthy...and even more happy to be getting healthier. My self-esteem still isn't the best in the world, but I can honestly say it's not the worst in the world, either. No more covering up...not Spiritually or physically. Spiritually...I'm an open book. Physically...my clothes fit and every fat roll is visible. ;-)

I guess that's the coolest part...I'm vulnerable. Life is much easier realizing and remembering that everybody--EVERYBODY--has Spiritual and physical defects. Some people just know how to cover it up a little better than others. For way too long, I was that person...tried to hide every flaw I had. Now...I find Freedom in exposure.

A couple of clarifications before I close out. One...Weight Watchers isn't a diet. It's a way of life! ;-) Two...me and Paul obviously didn't work out. It only took one date to see there didn't need to be a second or third!!!!! ;-) That's alright, though...my Blessing is coming soon. No doubt my man is on his way.